What do you say when you talk to yourself?

What do you say when you talk to yourself?

Let’s face it folks, no one is perfect. Think about what it would be like if we were. Perfect that is. How boring would that be? Yet we all seem to strive for that perfection in everything we do. We want the perfect job, perfect house, perfect body shape, perfect relationship. The list goes on and on. And when our lust for perfection eludes us we feel failure. We beat our selves up with all the woulda-shoulda-couldas we can come up with. We have to learn to be happy where we are, with what we have, in the present moment.

You are the author of your own story

You, and only you, have the ability to put good thoughts in and take bad thoughts out. You are the pencil and your feelings are the piece of paper the pencil writes on. What object here has the control? The paper? No, the pencil does! So when you start taking down to yourself, envision turning that pencil upside down and start using the eraser. It’s really as simple as that.

So now that we realize we are the pencil, we know we are the one writing the best-seller right? So how do we rewrite a story that has already happened? After all everyone has bad things that have happened to them in the past. These things have molded you into the main character of your story. But you have the control here. You get to write the journey, and the ending. How cool is that? I have this great friend who used to tell her kids, “go tell it to Oprah.” She wasn’t being mean, she was only getting her children to learn how to let things go.

How many things can you think of in the next sixty seconds that you are hanging on to that could potentially be holding you back from your highest good? Seriously, take one minute and write them down. If you are like me you will notice that there are some behavior patterns that are attached to some of these things. Learning how to dis empower the negative feelings attached to the scary part of your book are the trick to rewriting the end of the story. The memories will always be there but learning how to disassociate the feelings attached to them is the trick.

Ways to raise your vibration

Those feelings, especially ones that have been there for a long time, are like weeds with the longest root system you can imagine. It is hard to let go of them. After all they have been a part of your for a very long time. Behavioural patterns lock in and we seem to just learn to live with the pain associated with the emotional baggage we are lugging around. This baggage is like a strong magnet that keeps on attracting bad stuff to you. The trick here is to shift your vibrational energy. That magnet will attract good stuff just as easily as it attracts bad stuff, because you are the captain of the magnet directional pull.

You have to consciously decide that you want better. Release the unconscious zombie that reacts to the negative which is flowing into your world. Step out of the pain-spasm-pain cycle and break the chain. Ways to increase your vibrational frequency are:  meditation

  • Reach for a better thought. Remember something that feels good and focus on it.
  • Listen to peaceful relaxing music
  • Appreciate something, immediately
  • Take a moment to just breathe in goodness and breathe out joy
  • Guided meditation
  • Positive affirmations

Talk kindly to yourself

Now that you have started to rewrite this story it is very important to continue to talk kindly to yourself. Be your own hero! Show some respect and appreciation to that person staring back at you in the mirror. Have compassion for yourself and show gratitude for how far you have come. Create positive affirmations and say these positive affirmations daily.

How to create your list of positive affirmations

  • Start each one with I AM
  • Describe it as though you already have it
  • Keep it positive
  • Make it brief
  • Be very specific
  • Use “feeling” words

Write at least three of these down on index cards that you can toss in your purse and take with you. When you find yourself sitting in traffic, pull them out and look at yourself in the mirror and repeat them to yourself. Tape them to your bathroom mirror so you see them first thing in the morning. Put them under your pillow so you can make them the last thing on your mind before you close your eyes.


So the next time you catch yourself having a conversation in your head don’t beat yourself up, instead give yourself an atta-girl or atta-boy. You are great! Dig out those affirmations and start raising that vibrational frequency. When you catch yourself talking to others in your head, don’t tear them down or bless them out. Instead shift your thoughts to building them up. Think about ways you can help them to increase their own vibrations. Your thoughts are more transparent than you realize. You see, we are what we think. What we think will affect our body language. Our body language is very visible to the outside world. You are like a mirror facing outward to the world. Are you showing the world joy and happiness or are you displaying anger and hatred? Even if you are verbally expressing positive emotions, if you are thinking negative ones inside your mind it will cancel out what you are showing on the outside. Did you know that it takes three positive thoughts to counter balance one negative one? That mirror will reflect that to the outside world what you are really thinking. This applies to both what you think about yourself or someone else.

Next time you catch yourself thinking a dark thought say to yourself, “cancel cancel”. Then, with purpose, reach for a better thought. Sit back and watch the world around you change a bit, or a lot. It’s up to you.




4 thoughts on “What do you say when you talk to yourself?

  1. I will do my index cards. I think I will also do some that I feel guilt about. May help me to let go of them and as Oprah says live my authentic life. Thank you. I love reading your blog you inspire me to search my True Self. I find it hard sometimes in life, to let go of my failures. ❤️?. Side note I would tell my sons to tell Oprah, Tatia is right so they would not act like they had a rough life they did not. I hope it helped them to understand other people’s plight and to Emphasize with others. Love My boys ❤️❤️

    1. You have good kids, I think you can mark it off your list that they are good about understanding what others are going through. 🙂

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